December is the most exciting month (IMHO) to be at Northern Waters Smokehaus. Our mail order department swells with seasonal employees and processes hundreds of boxes each week; the smokers might process several hundred pounds of porketta or atlantic salmon in the same time; the line to our deli might look like a Summer day, if not for the heavy clothing; our deli staff has had a month to catch our breath and are in top form. December is a good month for our business.
Before we begin, a few tips for the busy month:
Skip the line, order delivery/pickup. Delivery and pickup hours are 10am-5pm daily. We deliver sandwiches as well as groceries and gift boxes. You can order online or over the phone, but online is easiest.Place your mail orders early. This ensures that we have what you want in stock. In the late Fall, we incentivize early orders. Basically, as with most things, it is better to plan ahead.
Now, five more things for you.
- Catalog Launch Party! We finally did it! We assembled a highly-skilled team and created our first official product catalog, which some have called “beautiful” and others have remarked “looks like it was made by professionals,” which only stings a little bit, because we are so dang proud of ourselves. The catalog contains lovely descriptions of a large swath of the products we carry, charming anecdotes about life at Northern Waters Smokehaus, insights into the guiding principles and philosophy of our business, and abundant visual splendors. Oh, and prices. Sure, it’s a product catalog, but it is also something more than that, and we really hope you enjoy it. If you want to pick up or peruse one, stop into our deli and ask us.In honor of the catalog’s release, we put together a small gathering in our office on Wednesday night. I missed the first hour, but hear it was shoulder to shoulder. By the end it was almost entirely Smokehaus employees, just lingering and enjoying an opportunity to hang out off-the-clock and eat packing peanuts. This week, I learned that the packing peanuts we use for mail orders are basically popcorn.
- Waterdeep! Well, we’ve done it. Dino-Force Five has saved Faerûn from the terror of the giants and gone it’s separate ways. I wasn’t sure if our weekly D&D sessions merited another Thing™, but the end of one campaign and the beginning of another feels noteworthy enough, and our group has added on two new members. The new cast of characters is an ex-cop half-orc barbarian with anger issues, a rock gnome rogue and a wood-elf druid who have been BFFs for about a hundred years and who specialize in cultivating, refining and distributing herbal *ahem* medicine throughout the city, an eladrin wizard who is a friendly rival to the druid, and mysterious and gregarious tiefling bard who aims to please but seems to have a hidden agenda all residing in the coastal city of Waterdeep,. The scenario seems to be leading toward a heist, but for now I am suspending all assumptions. We meet most Monday nights in the Smokehaus office, though realistically we're going to have to relocate while the mail order department utilizes that space.
- Terrine! Smoked duck breast terrines will be available in our grab&go case this weekend. A terrine is a layered preparation of meat/vegetable/fruit/et cetera contained within aspic or another gelatinous solution. Our smoked duck terrines are set with duck confit, red wine cranberry jam (with hints of anise, clove and black pepper) and sliced candied orange as a garnish, set with agar-agar. The flavor is reminiscent of a holiday meal. Serve alongside dry red wine, a very soft cheese (like Rush Creek Reserve) and a nice crusty bread or cracker.
- Winter Village! This weekend, we’ll be at the Glensheen Winter Village, selling salumi, cheese, and cracker bento boxes, salumi, swag (t-shirts, posters, stickers, and such), and gift certificates. The Winter Village is a magical event, and one of three of its ilk going on in the area, alongside the Julebyen in Knife River and the Washington Artists’ Co-op craft sale. I am told there will also be llamas and a sauna on the premises at Glensheen. We’ll be running a gift certificate special in the month of December: buy $100 worth of gift cards, and get a bonus $20 gift card. Once, I helped a customer purchase $900 of gift cards, and receive $180 in bonus gift cards. It felt epic.Also in December: If you have purchased one of our tote bags, bring it with when you come to our shop in December and receive 10% off your order, all month long. If you don’t have a tote already, purchase one and receive 10% off your order. We’ll be running tote specials in the future.
- Record-breaking Pigs In Space!!! We had a successful Cyber Monday here at Northern Waters Smokehaus. Our second annual Pigs In Space promotion left us with 75 new orders to fill. Pigs in Space, for those who just walked into the room, is our promotion run every Monday-after-the-fourth-Thursday-in-November which offers free shipping on online orders over $150.
That's all, folks. Happy Friday.
This is the first time my readability assessment has been "Good," so perhaps groggy, reserved Ned is onto something.
